The Rules Of Reputation
by solitudeseeker
Summary: A LandonJamie story. The secret letters they sent, The secret friendship they had will all change after this one leap of faith.(complete)


The only things that are different are that her mom is alive, they never dated and Jamie didn't die which is basically the whole movie.  
  
Disclaimer- don't own the characters  
  
The Rules Of Reputation - A Landon/ Jamie story  
  
Part 1- Writing  
  
Dear Landon,  
  
I look up, over the rim of my bible, and see you starring right back at me. I smile softly and look back down but I know you are still watching because you always are. Ever since the play you have been watching me, thinking you are sneaky but I have seen every lost wink and sly grin, every look you have given me with those hazel eyes of yours. I have even talked to you but you don't give me the time because you have a reputation to protect. Your reputation isn't hurt by careless grins and wandering eyes because every girl in this school thinks it is to them but they have always been to me.  
  
You wanted to be secret friends but I turned you down because we have always been. Wordless communication and thoughtless motions show me that we are friends. The way when your friends play jokes on me you just pretend to laugh at me, again the word reputation comes to mind but I don't use it in that sentence. I just comment that it came to mind so you understand that I understand even if I don't want to write on paper in a full sentence so I am stating that it is true. I know you are deeper than that Landon Carter, I always have.  
  
You are a young man with an old soul. You have more brains than you give yourself credit for and you have a bigger heart than your chest can hold but I am sure it will grow with the coming years.  
  
You are probably reading over this wondering why I took the time to write this out and why I am doing this or maybe you have already thrown this away. I doubt it though.  
  
I have written this because I see you Landon. You. I know you see me too.  
  
Love,  
  
Jamie Sullivan  
  
I sealed the envelope and set it on my desk, along with the millions of attempted letters that I have tried to write over the past couple of weeks. A couple of houses down, though, someone else is doing the same.........  
  
Dear Jamie,  
  
I see you everyday sitting at the same lunch table taken away in a lost world of hope and faith. I watch you actually, and I hope you haven't realized that till now because I want it to be a surprise.  
  
You have been on my mind for a while, and believe it or not I have loved you since that night when I made that change in the script when I acted from my soul instead of some sheet of paper. I wish I could tell you in person but I can't. I am not a man like you think I am, I am a coward. You have every right to be mad at me for the way I have treated you but it has all been fake. Never would I let out a full belly laugh at the sake of your misfortune. I wink at you and grin at you from time to time to remind you of this but I am sure you think it is to some other girl but it is not. It is all for you. Maybe things will be different tomorrow or in the future. Wait I know they will be.  
  
I will always watch over you Jamie.  
  
Love always,  
  
Landon Carter  
  
I sighed and folded the letter and slipped it in an envelope. Almost in sync (although I do not realize) I am walking out and reaching my mailbox, as you are reaching yours. I look up for a split second, the midnight wind whipping at my face, and I watch you slip an envelope in. probably to protest some sort of religious battle. You look up as I am slipping mine in, probably assuming I am sending off to some playboy magazine subscription and we never make contact. That is how it always has been. Maybe this will change things, maybe I will bend my reputation to be with you, and maybe I won't.  
  
Part 2- receiving  
  
I sighed and clutched my bible to my chest as though shielding myself from the humiliation of the fact that I sent that letter. How I would like to dive in front of the mail truck right now and stop it from putting that letter in but I can't because it is beside me now, delivering my mail so you have received it. I see you down there getting your mail, humming along to some hip-hop beat I am sure, so I am busted.  
  
I grab my mail with the free hand and thank the lady. Flipping through the letters fast, I don't notice yours until it falls out and onto the paved walk. I grab it and flip it over, seeing my name in male handwriting and your name in the return address area. My heart speeds up and I can feel it pounding against my chest as I rip open the letter and unfold it, the words in front of my face.  
  
My excited expression turns to disappointment and then to melancholy. It was never what I expected, because this tomorrow was today and nothing has changed. Then I see the love and wonder how you are responding to mine.........  
  
I read over the letter, shocked at its contents but confused at the same time. How could she know it was all for her? How could she think we were friends when I had treated her like shit? We were graduating tomorrow and then we were off forever. Oh well, I muttered sighing. I held the letter and walked up to my room and put it in my keepsake box along with pictures from the play and some baby stuff. Little did I know the future would hold more.  
  
Part 3- future  
  
We graduated the next day and I was valedictorian. After saying a few pointless words and admitting my sickness to the class their were still giggles about the fact that I, Jamie Sullivan, was still such a freak to them so I decided I was moving on with my life and with Landon. It was over, finite, and accomplished. I had told him how I really felt and that was all I could do.  
  
Today is our ten year reunion and after miraculously recovering from leukemia I was back. I don't know why I am even bothering but something good has to come out of this.  
  
I sat back during short speeches about how lovely everything had been and then I saw him. In all his radiance he was up there. I felt the letter; it was in my sock, like it had been during graduation. I had given part of my heart to him and he never returned it.  
  
"Attention everyone please, I would like to read a letter that I sent to a fellow classmate a few years ago whose name will go unmentioned but they know who they are and if they are out there please forgive me and meet me at the Hotel Pierre tonight at seven. A limo will pick you up at your house if you are the right person. I need to get over a certain barrier in my life that I have got to get over." Landon started, taking out a sheet of paper. This had better not be his touchy Belinda fest I thought or I will have to leave. A few random claps were heard but other than that nobody said a word. I think, secretly, every girl wanted it to be them.  
  
"I see you everyday sitting at the same lunch table taken away in a lost world of hope and faith. I watch you actually, and I hope you haven't realized that till now because I want it to be a surprise. You have been on my mind for a while, and believe it or not I have loved you since that night when I made that change in the script when I acted from my soul instead of some sheet of paper. I wish I could tell you in person but I can't. I am not a man like you think I am, I am a coward. You have every right to be mad at me for the way I have treated you but it has all been fake. Never would I let out a full belly laugh at the sake of your misfortune. I wink at you and grin at you from time to time to remind you of this but I am sure you think it is to some other girl but it is not. It is all for you. Maybe things will be different tomorrow or in the future. Wait I know they will be. I will always watch over you." He finished, some people were tearing up at the sweetness of the letter but I was dumbstruck.  
  
Surely not, I looked up for a split second and met his eye, blushing I looked down and got the letter out of my sock and ran down to the bathroom. This cannot be happening!  
  
I heard footsteps and the door open, "Uh Jamie." I heard a male voice call. Oh my gosh this cannot be happening. Landon Carter in the girl's restroom looking for me!  
  
"Uh yea." I asked, staying in the stall.  
  
"Can you come out?" he asked.  
  
"Uh sure hold on." I muttered, stuffing the letter in my shoe and opening my purse I ran a brush through my hair and applied some chapstick. I made sure I looked okay and zipped it up.  
  
"Sorry," I said, opening the door and walking out to a now dumbstruck Landon.  
  
Wow!! She looks great, better than from a distance. Her hair has a wave to it now and that black slinky dress looks beautiful on her.  
  
"You look.........wow I don't even know." I admitted sheepishly.  
  
"Is that bad?" she asked, giving me a small grin.  
  
"Not at all," I said, returning the grin.  
  
"Will you be there tonight at seven?" I asked nervously, scared shit of being turned down.  
  
"Maybe," she said seductively, walking past me and out the door. I stood there for a few moments at a loss of words then realized their was no one to talk to in the restroom. Then left the party, I had to get ready for tonight; it was so going to happen.  
  
Part 4- preparing  
  
I slipped on the red dress, my mom in the other room.  
  
"I always knew yall would get together," she commented as the clocked chimed six thirty. I had been getting ready all afternoon.  
  
The red dress came up to mid-thigh and hung fairly loose but still showed off the curves of my hips. I considered changing; I mean maybe I should wear the ankle length black dress that I was wearing today.  
  
"Mom, I don't know if I should wear this, you can come in." I said nervously, twirling a piece of my major crimped from earlier, hair. "You look great honey, very sexy." She commented, giving me a hug.  
  
"You smell great too," she added, giving me a huge confident smile.  
  
"Thanks but I don't know this is a little short for me." I muttered.  
  
"Have fun with this Jamie, you want to knock him off his socks right?" she asked.  
  
"Yea." I admitted.  
  
"Then if he was impressed with your dress this morning he will die when he sees you in this one. Now go you will be late," she said, as she finished hatching the diamond necklace to my neck.  
  
"Ok fine! Thanks mom for everything," I said quietly.  
  
"No trouble, now go and remember smart, sexy and confident! He loves you Jamie, he always has." she said, scooting me out the door and downstairs to the limo that Landon had rented for me.  
  
I climbed in the limo and tapped my fingers nervously, looking out the tinted windows at the scenery going by. I wanted to open the window but it would mess up my hair.  
  
Finally we arrived, and the driver got out and opened the door. All those years of anticipating waiting and hoping were coming true. All those nights of wondering what it meant and the letter I had read so many times and cried over so many times was going to explain and show its self up now.  
  
I was suppose to meet him in the dinning room so I got out and headed up the stairs and to the main desk to ask for directions.  
  
"Down this hall and to the right miss." He said, pointing to a long corridor.  
  
"Thank you," I said, strutting down the hall and pausing in front of the door to straighten my dress and take a deep breath.  
  
I turned to the entrance and saw Landon sitting over to the right. I caught his eye and kept it as I walked toward him. I reached the table as he was standing up.  
  
"Jamie," he whispered softly as I reached the table.  
  
"Hello Landon," I said quietly as I watched him look me over. I cringed slightly but remained in good posture.  
  
"You look absolutely drop dead gorgeous." He finally said, giving me a solemn and sincere look.  
  
"Thank you," I said, blushing and looking down. He slowly pulled my face up and looked me dead in the eye, "For all the times I haven't said anything." He said, turning me around and slipping off my jacket. His warm hands on my skin made me tremble slightly and I could feel him smirking behind me.  
  
He pulled out my chair and graciously, I sat down across from him.  
  
"So what will it be?" he asked, looking up from the menu.  
  
"Whatever you are having," I said. He laughed and closed his menu.  
  
"Choose what you want Jamie," he encouraged.  
  
"Are you sure?" I asked, nervously.  
  
"Positive, it's all on me." he said, giving me a grin.  
  
"Ok then," I said, deciding on whatever I wanted.  
  
Part 5- Reputation crushed  
  
I laughed and pushed my plate back, finished with desert.  
  
"Finished?" he asked, pulling my plate over and taking a bite of my chocolate pie.  
  
"Yea I am stuffed, but apparently you aren't. Take it. " I replied  
  
"Nah I am done," he said, getting up.  
  
"Alright then," I said, standing up as he had done.  
  
"Let's go," he replied, taking my hand in his and leading me out of the hotel and back to the limo.  
  
"Where are we going?" I asked.  
  
"I am not telling," he replied, sticking his hand over my lips to shut me up. I swear for someone who has never really known me he has me figured out.  
  
I released my hand, wishing I didn't have to, from Jamie's mouth and set it back down. I watched, giving the driver directions to get to the restaurant.  
  
"Another restaurant?" Jamie asked, confused.  
  
"Well yea sort of so we have to order drinks or something but we are here to dance. They have shitty food but the music is great for dancing." I said, leading her in.  
  
"When did you learn to dance?" she asked, remembering my inability to dance from high school.  
  
"Three months ago when I planned this," I said simply, taking her hand.  
  
"For me?" she asked in bewilderment.  
  
"Yea, I knew you liked to dance so why not do it here. I wasn't sure, though; if you would be alive because after I lost you I left Beaufort and didn't contact my mom for five years." I admitted.  
  
"Wow," she said breathlessly. "Then lets dance," she added, pulling me onto the floor. A slow song came on and we began to dance, her arms around my neck and my arms around her waist. She laid her head on my shoulder, letting out a small sigh against the hairs of my neck. I wanted to scream to her what she was doing to me but instead I remained calm and continued to dance.  
  
"You smell wonderful," I whispered into her ear as she continued to hug herself against me.  
  
"You do too," she added, stepping back to face me. I leaned closer to her, her lips millimeters from mine, as she whispered the words "You broke the rules of reputation" I kissed her softly and we continued to dance. I whispered the final words that put us together, "It was all for you."  
  
Author's note- It's Valentines Day so I had to write it. Hope you enjoyed it, plz review and let me know what you thought! icancu 


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